How it All Started

My journey started many years ago. It was 2005, as a new graduate, I had no clue what I wanted to do with my life. Who really does straight out of high school? I spent a considerable amount of time in high school doing theater. I couldn’t get on board with the idea of doing that for the rest of my life. Or what do they call that? Ah yes, COMMITMENT. Now don’t get me wrong acting, costumes and morphing into someone else is fun and something I do a lot of in my animated short projects and the like. Yet here I found myself on the end of the spectrum of a ‘bright kid’ with no direction whatsoever. ~Cue the dramatic music~ A recruiter from a well-known for-profit ‘institute’ (with shady recruiting practices might I add – major side-eye!!!) came to our school on my very last day. It would be fate.

On Forward

Fast forward I went and left college twice. Sometimes when you’re young you have to take the extra-long route of ‘knowing’ to realize you know nothing at all. First moving to Philadelphia, I realized it was too much like home, too much freedom I knew nothing to do with, and undiagnosed mental illness that was further fueled by denial and substance abuse. My struggles to commit or get anything done became even more exasperated. That ‘bright kid’ I once was became a dull kid that stayed on the couch looking out the high rise building I lived in longing to shower, or even just get up and out the door. No degree in hand I left and started back at square one. I moved back home feeling both disappointed yet relieved. The second move was to Washington DC. My mental health, bounced back…sorta . I was a little more focused. My emphasis here is a little. My time in DC opened up even more wounds and struggles I was unaware of. But when your 21 and able to buy alcohol legally welp the lines get blurred and you find yourself smashed on a Wednesday afternoon at the local taco place. My studies suffered, money dwindled, and I dropped out again since my money train came to a halt. Oh those loans and when you have no concept of how money really works you find yourself even more lost and confused and royally screwed. Those margaritas were LIT though.

Time to Get Serious

After those college attempts and fails I welcomed my first child in 2010. Talk about GAME CHANGER. Any career or study opportunities I thought to do became that much more harder. I wasn’t just supporting myself anymore. So with that, I worked a string of unfulfilling jobs. Sexism, racism, discrimination and all the other things workers with little options have to deal with. I was a single mother that had to provide. I only knew how to work and so that’s what I did. 2013 came and I welcomed my second son. Earlier in this same year I attempted to go back to community college but with a new child it became undoable. I dropped out. Again. Third times the charm right? Yeeeaaahhh no. This is when my life slowly started to pivot. Remember that whole mental health struggle earlier? Yea, finally, I decided to take myself more serious and GET HELP. I started seeing a therapist. Though it had more to do with a very unhealthy toxic relationship than my depression. I got a standard 9-5 accounting job and started making progress. Moved into my own apartment with the kiddos and continued to work.

The thing about mental health is when you don’t deal with it thoroughly it will continue to come back. But I will save that for another post.

I finally have a degree in web development and interactive media. This came from relocating back to PA but in a different city, Harrisburg. Going back to community college AGAIN and finishing. It took longer and I finished in my 30s but with the perspective I had from my 20s I knew what to avoid, what was going to help me thrive and so on. I graduated May 2020.

Wait, what? 2020 Happen

2020 was a whirlwind of a year for all of us, I found myself on a forced sabbatical. Rest for the sake of rest was needed and in many cases unavoidable. I spent the prior 2-3 yrs working around the clock on my degree in addition to working a full-time job. Needless to say, determination, clarity, focus, and Wellbutrin came through for the win. With this newfound outlook on life and the world as we know it, 2020 was my year to just chill. So I may have lied just a tad. I didn’t completely rest. My third son was born in January of 2020 and I landed a part-time job working from home. But now here we are in 2021

The Plan to Plan a plan

I wanted my own business. I wanted to feel like all my hard work was worth it when I was so uncertain it was. When I wanted to quit numerous times but didn’t. Planning and planning and planning and more planning until I realized planning was about ALL I was doing while actually working fell by the waist side. When your to-do list becomes a to-do list you know it’s time to re-evaluate. You get the point. But what I find maddening about myself is that the first step to just DO it is both anxiety-riddled and so simple. No wonder many great ideas amount to just that. An idea. There is something to be said about feeling like it’s the right time and just forgoing the feeling because most times it never comes. It’s best instead to simply make the present moment the right time. My longtime standing website lacked my creative touches and general updating. Enter my inception style of to-do lists. But this time I made a list I found myself pushing to complete that list before starting another and over 4 months my site is a step close to being ‘perfect’ or in other words feeling ‘right’.

You Have to Start

You have to start. You must start no matter what! No matter where you are start and put yourself out there. There is always time to craft and perfect and to make better. For the critics, you have to ignore them. Advice will come in the forms it needs that you will appreciate. It will offer value to make you better, not worse. A suggestion shouldn’t make you feel like banging your head against the wall and giving up on your passion. Instead, it should offer insight on how to be better. And even then you can always take it or leave it. Realizing you are not meant for everyone and everyone isn’t meant for you is OK! (something I’m still accepting) There are a lot of us on earth. Different strokes for different folks. I digress. I guess what I’m trying to say is to be successful at anything: you have to start, know that you will never feel ready, allow yourself grace to grow, understand where you’re starting is NOT how you’re going to finish. Oh and to keep them haters away don’t your energy on them. Periodt. Success is subjective at best. What one considers success another might consider failure. What I’ve found in this journey (which I’m still going on might I add) is, success is giving yourself permission to dream vividly and wildly AND boldly going toward it through everyday actions. The foundational things you can learn easily. Believing in yourself and pushing through no matter what that’s the challenge. But the fun thing about that is, you’re only battling yourself. So step aside and do what you gotta do.

Now What Do You Do?

So how did I find success as a Designer? Below you will find a list of ‘Think Abouts’ that helped me get to where I am now….

1. Decide this is what you really want to do. You must make the active choice and COMMIT. Without this crucial step everything else is pointless.
2. Get training within design. No good if you don’t have a foundation of the basics. I always like the saying ‘learn the rules so you know how to break them later.’ In time your style and system will come through but before that time learn the basics. Through my various attempts of school I was able to at least complete the basics. This really allowed me to have the foundation I needed to succeed later.
3. Accept that you will not be that great at first. This is a big one because you will see many people with better-looking portfolios than you but they have also been doing it for longer. You have to start somewhere. Every master was once a beginner. So give yourself some grace and master the basics and know in the beginning your work might feel or look like trash.
4. If you’re going to do it for free do it for something you believe in. Unless you feel strongly about your friend’s band or podcast you’re making a site, logo, design etc for I would say not to do it for free. Non-profits or charity work is a good place here. Believe in the cause? Reach out and help get the word out. Now this for some is a nah. They don’t believe you should ever offer free work. I totally get it. The standpoint I come from is, sometimes you have to struggle and fail say on a ‘free’ type project to really get better and be better equip to handle a paid project. My first site design was for a non-profit..for free..and I taught me so much that had it been a paid project I’m certain I would’ve been fired and not compensated or at min I would have only had a deposit. I messed up a lot. Made major rookie mistakes. The experience, however, was more priceless. It gave me the confidence I needed for later jobs.
5. Practice, Practice , and oh yeah PRACTICE. I can not stress this enough. Flex your design muscles by practicing everyday if you can. Even doing mundane stuff makes a difference. It is the only way to get better, to work more efficient and to master your domain.
6. Start small ask business professionals in your own circle of family and friends if they require a website, logo, design etc. No project is too small and every project matters.
7. Put yourself out there. Social Media Sites are excellent for this. Why? Because it’s free, starting out you need this. Creating content with value to those online is clutch. By blogging giving tips and tricks and so on you are establishing yourself as an asset. It’s also another way of flexing your creativity knowledge.
8. Be like water free-flowing and adaptable. This means stay flexible. Routines are fine but when you become too rigid it can stunt growth as a designer. Stay focused but loose.
9. Never stop learning. Read, take a class, follow an online tutorial, ask questions on blogs… get informed! This pairs well with the creating of content also. Not only is it important to share what you know but to also learn the things you don’t know or are lesser known areas of expertise.
10. Charge you’re worth. No one can tell you this. But a good rule of thumb is to look at the companies hiring in your area, the title you have, and look at other forums to get an estimate of what others are paying/charging. The one-time lookin’ at others can be a good thing. This is a means to figuring out what you’re comfortable charging. On a later post I’ll go more into the intricacies that is compensation.
11. **Bonus have fun! Life isn’t all work and no play and between all the marketing, networking, designing and more make sure throughout the process, you are having fun! Confession I have the most fulfillment when I’m stuck on a problem and finally have a breakthrough to solving it.

Now Your Journey Begins

This will look different for everyone. For me it has span 16 years and I’m still learning. There is no too late, or too old, or even too young. Commit. Start. Do. And repeat. Life will always happen and in many cases, especially for a creative, not in the way you planned it. Or if you’re like me, you didn’t even have a plan. This is all ok. I hope you’re able to take something from this and that it helps you along your journey where ever you are. What are some “think abouts” on your list that wasn’t on mine? How did it help you? I’d love to hear them.

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Till next time. peas J.